A life changing moment

My heart, my thoughts and my prayers, are with my daughter-in-law and her family this week.  Her only brother passed away after a long. hard fight with the vicious disease of cancer.  He was 17 years old.

I have felt the gut-wrenching pain of death.  I have had my loved ones ripped from my life, and I have had them slip slowly and silently away.  I know of grief, and yet I can’t take hers from her, and make this walk just a little easier for her.

The sympathy cards.  Oh how I hated getting them, simply because of the reason for the card.  I didn’t want to be “that person” in need of sympathy.  I welcomed the comfort, but it was the sympathy that I didn’t want to be a part of.  I didn’t want to keep being reminded over and over again of the pain.

I just wanted the pain to stop, and I wanted my loved one back again.

I know that my daughter-in-law wants this more than anything else in life right now.  She wants the pain to stop, and she just wants to hug him, and see his smile again.  She wants him alive, and healthy, and back in her life again.

The tears are so tiring, the pain grows weary, and some days the burden of the loss is just too great. Will I ever feel normal again?

The answer is, no.  Never again.  This is a life changing moment.  She will never look at life through the same lenses, she will continually be aware of  his absence, and there will be days when she just won’t want to go on.

I know this is true, but I also know that my God will be her only Source of strength and comfort.  I am praying she finds this peace and comfort.